Yesterday, for whatever reason, was the first day that I've felt genuinely excited about my upcoming surgeries. I've definitely felt eager and driven and anxious about them, but not truly excited. In fact, it's so exciting I can taste it! Surgery day feels real and tangible for the first time. It is 3 1/2 weeks away and my whole being knows and understands that -- finally! I am noticing some relief of the driven and anxious feeling as the pure excitement sets in. Now this is what I'm talking about!
I think these next 3 1/2 weeks will definitely fly by. My wife gets home from being away for the week later today, and it's a long weekend. I'm looking forward to relaxing and doing some fun things, and when the weekend is over it'll be Tuesday already, and that means I'll be 3 weeks away from surgery day. Work will be busy for me these next 3 weeks as will life. This is indeed exciting!
I have some internet friends who have recently had top surgery or who are soon having it. It has been so exciting to support them and watch them prepare and recover. I have no excuse to make any mistakes with my own healing and recovery as there are many people from whom I have recently had the opportunity to watch and learn. I know exactly what to expect with surgery itself. I know what my incisions and scars will look like. I know what it feels like to get drains removed. I'm a very well informed patient, so now I just keep getting excited and try to wait patiently.
Bring it on!
Friday, May 22, 2009
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Passing Time And Counting Down
There's nothing like being sick to pass the time. Last week it was a nasty cold, this week it was food poisoning. I'm currently hijacked by PMS. If it's not one thing it's certainly something else. I really hope that I am getting all illness out of the way now so that I am in good health for surgery.
I keep finding myself wanting to think that it's weird and strangely symbolic that I am about to have my period for the very last time, but I don't. I am not feeling much of anything about it except for being grateful that this is it. There will be no mourning of my womanhood or anything like that. In fact, that seems quite silly to even think about. I just want to start my period already so that I can get it over with and not look back! Last month was brutal so I'm prepared for this one to be a doozy. Who knows...maybe it will be a walk in the park. I just know that by having my period this month, I am that much closer to surgery day and to reclaiming my body.
I'm still trying to figure out last minute logistical things. My gynecologist, Dr. Knox, never received medical clearance from my hematologist, Dr. Terpenning, for me to have surgery, even though she gave it to me at the end of March. So I had to call Dr. Terpenning to inquire about the clearance as well as about having a prescription for an anti-coagulant mailed to me. My poor mom has to give me a shot in the stomach for a few days post-op so my blood doesn't clot. Dr. Knox doesn't need any special lab work done since my chest surgeon, Dr. Salomonson, already sent me a lab slip for pre-op blood work. I would love nothing more than to not have to go see Dr. Terpenning again. I of course already have my work days mapped out from now until my last day before surgery, so having to schedule an appointment at this point would just be a pain.
I asked Manya, the surgery guru at Dr. Knox's office, what the deal is with having to stay in the hospital post-op. If I have to have an abdominal hysterectomy, they will keep me for at least 1 night, often 2, and if I have the surgery done laproscopically, they usually don't keep you unless you are feeling really sick and don't feel up to going home. I am of course hoping for the best for reasons of less trauma to my body and a quicker recovery, but I also just don't want to have to stay in the hospital longer than a few hours post-op. I would much rather go home and get in bed with my cat and sleep off the anesthesia. Dr. Knox will give me all of my prescriptions for pain and anti-nausea medications at my pre-op appointment so that I can fill them before surgery.
And so the countdown is on. I have 16 days of work left before my pre-op appointment with Dr. Knox and before I go on leave for surgery. I have 24 days until my mom arrives in LA. I have 26 days until my pre-op appointment with Dr. Salomonson. And I have 27 days until surgery!
Not that I'm counting.
I keep finding myself wanting to think that it's weird and strangely symbolic that I am about to have my period for the very last time, but I don't. I am not feeling much of anything about it except for being grateful that this is it. There will be no mourning of my womanhood or anything like that. In fact, that seems quite silly to even think about. I just want to start my period already so that I can get it over with and not look back! Last month was brutal so I'm prepared for this one to be a doozy. Who knows...maybe it will be a walk in the park. I just know that by having my period this month, I am that much closer to surgery day and to reclaiming my body.
I'm still trying to figure out last minute logistical things. My gynecologist, Dr. Knox, never received medical clearance from my hematologist, Dr. Terpenning, for me to have surgery, even though she gave it to me at the end of March. So I had to call Dr. Terpenning to inquire about the clearance as well as about having a prescription for an anti-coagulant mailed to me. My poor mom has to give me a shot in the stomach for a few days post-op so my blood doesn't clot. Dr. Knox doesn't need any special lab work done since my chest surgeon, Dr. Salomonson, already sent me a lab slip for pre-op blood work. I would love nothing more than to not have to go see Dr. Terpenning again. I of course already have my work days mapped out from now until my last day before surgery, so having to schedule an appointment at this point would just be a pain.
I asked Manya, the surgery guru at Dr. Knox's office, what the deal is with having to stay in the hospital post-op. If I have to have an abdominal hysterectomy, they will keep me for at least 1 night, often 2, and if I have the surgery done laproscopically, they usually don't keep you unless you are feeling really sick and don't feel up to going home. I am of course hoping for the best for reasons of less trauma to my body and a quicker recovery, but I also just don't want to have to stay in the hospital longer than a few hours post-op. I would much rather go home and get in bed with my cat and sleep off the anesthesia. Dr. Knox will give me all of my prescriptions for pain and anti-nausea medications at my pre-op appointment so that I can fill them before surgery.
And so the countdown is on. I have 16 days of work left before my pre-op appointment with Dr. Knox and before I go on leave for surgery. I have 24 days until my mom arrives in LA. I have 26 days until my pre-op appointment with Dr. Salomonson. And I have 27 days until surgery!
Not that I'm counting.
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